You may be Aspergers if…installment 2.

You always eat at the same restaurants because there are safe items on the menu.
All your moments are awkward moments.
You’ve said to people, “That’s just my face.”
You’re either utterly obsessed or uninterested.
You don’t argue… You just explain why you’re right.
 Why DID that chicken cross the road?  And why is it funny when a Rabbi, a Priest walk into a bar?

You might be Aspergers if…

You might be Aspergers if…

You get excited about noise canceling ear plugs.
When you watch Bob Ross and can’t understand why the bush is so happy.
When you attend princess weddings and don’t understand why the bride wants so much attention.
When you can give and answer in one word, but people expect more.
When you communicate with Autistic people in a direct way and nobody gets their feelings hurt. And can also pick up the same conversation a week later without confusion.
Textbooks are exciting. And you’d rather stay at home to study than going to a club.
You sort things for fun.
You understand that words don’t come from people’s eyes. Why look there?
When you get excited about having a week with nothing scheduled and you happily spend it alone watching Sci-fi.

They said, what?

I was in a room of student teachers the other day after work. They were talking about a student who cries everyday. She said she didn’t know what was wrong with him. “He must have a touch of Aspergers,” she said. And everyone in the room burst out laughing. I sat there feeling angry and ashamed that I didn’t say anything. I wanted to tell them that they had hurt my feelings, but I couldn’t speak up.  Now, I just imagine what I could have said to shock them into shutting up. Am I a joke?


“You don’t look Autistic.”

When people think of Aspergers, they. see mostly men who live in their mothers basement. They see nerds wearing fedoras and playing video games. people don’t really ever think of women with Aspergers. But if they do they see a nerdy tomboy without makeup or girly clothing. but I want people to know the truth. I spent most of my life being bullied physically and emotionally. I was suicidal from this. But I have worked hard learning to fit in to the point I appear normal. But I’m not. I have terrible anxiety, I have a routine I stick to or I get freaked out. Socializing is incredibly hard and I usually end up not talking because its hard to read people. Once you get to know me you can see it. I think very logically, I separate emotion from logic when making a decision, if I can make one at all. I’m clumsy and have very little hand eye coordination. I fall a lot. Sometimes I fall non-verbal and my brain can’t get words to my mouth. It’s like a train going off the tracks. I do rock and flap like many Autistic do. I cover my ears to normal noises because they hurt. Lights give me migraines and my skin is dull to pain. I could bleed and not notice it. Yes, I have Aspergers and I have an eye for color, shape, texture and patterns. My obsession is makeup and vintage clothes. I want people to change their expectations of how I should look. I no longer want to hear, “you dont look Autistic.” Challenge your expectations. I am Autistic and beautiful.


I fluctuate between loquacious and uncommunicative.  In times of stress my Autism symptom get so severe I start to stutter and finally I can’t even speak. Words can’t make it to my mouth. It is really hard to be rendered non-verbal and it is very scary. 

Think of it as a computer. If your router isn’t working your internet cannot share information to your laptop. It’ feels like that, like a wire is cut in my head. A disconnection.
 So, I ask people to not make me talk, usually forcing it out loudly. “No talk!” Then I get to escape to the back of my mind and disconnect.
Please stop telling me I don’t know what real Autism is.

Diagnosing Neurotypical Disorder.

this post is tongue in cheek.

There is a disorder that many Autistics are aware of. It is commonly known as Neurotypical Disorder, also know as NTD. Their behaviors remain baffling to us. Communication remains taxing. Here is a brief overview of these behaviors.

People with this disorder use emotion to make decisions, are often irrational, and have trouble with ‘literal’ conversation. Their drive is social. They have a mysterious language that isn’t understandable to Autistics.  Neurotypicals can communicate with a look and often say one thing and mean another. Accompanied with this is a high incidence of lying and evasiveness. 

Neurotypicals are preoccupied with social concerns often are rigid in their social conventions. Conformity runs rampant. They have certain rituals that bond them to a group. Other people are viewed as extensions of themselves. Sufferers often believe that their experiences and beliefs are the right ones. Differences are not tolerated and feared.
There appears to be a social hierarchy that they live by.  The NT with the most stuff wins.  There is a “social ladder” that they strive to “climb.” Either with sex, education, money, small talk, or careers. They are in constant competition.  Being higher on this “ladder” makes you a more important person.
Mating seems to be their primary focus. They have specific dances they utilize to attract a mate. Often drunk and with deafening electronic music they “shake that thang” to garner attention. If ones perceived attractiveness of another is less than that perceived of themselves they will strongly and rudely reject the possible mate.  This leaves room for indignation. And many NTs don’t get “laid.”
The way they perceive to world is often narrow and they insist that they are correct even when the evidence goes against them, and often refuting other valid options. NTs have issue with detail and often think too abstractly. They miss seeing parts of the whole and ignore small details. Their observation skills leave much to be desired.
Sadly, there is no known treatment or cure for this disorder. All we can do is remain patient and work with them ensure healthy development.  Accepting them and trying to understand them may make them more comfortable among us Autistic people.
I hope to further my research by studying their drinking and mating habits. I believe much can be learned about how they communicate.  Hopefully, one day we may come to understand Neurotypicals.